May 18, 2004

You hurt yourself HOW?

I was listening to Colin Cowherd on ESPN radio the other day, and he mentioned that Sammy Sosa had hurt himself sneezing. This of course caused him to go over the myriad and ridiculous ways athletes had hurt themselves. Things like sprained thumbs from playing video games, strained eyeballs from watching TV in the dark, JD Drew’s recent misadventures in his swimming pool and so on. He then threw it open to listeners. This was a great idea, and I was sorry I couldn’t call in.

I was 17, and up in my room watching TV. I was a spoiled child, so I had everything I’d ever need up there. Anyway, I was lying on my bed, and I had this habit of tossing my remote control up in the air and catching it. I’d toss the damned thing pretty high too, there were marks on my ceiling where it’d hit. Well this time I missed. It hit my right in face, stung a bit, but I swore a couple times and didn’t think anything of it.

Until the next morning, when after my shower, I noticed something strange about my face in the bathroom mirror. I had managed to take off a noticeable chunk of my front tooth. As with all teenagers, I immediately thought of how I was going to explain this to my parents. I took the honest way out and told my mother. She took a moment to explain to me just how stupid I was, which I accepted. I mean, I was tossing my remote control up in the air, really isn’t any defense for that. She took me to the dentist; he looked me over, chuckled about how it happened. The good news was the tooth was fine, I’d snapped off an unimportant part. He could pull it out and give me a false one, but there really wasn’t any reason too.

So I still have my stupidly chipped tooth. I still have to find elaborate lies to explain it. I was in a fight, or hit by a baseball, or was in a skiing accident. Luckily, for me, the Mrs. Frinklin waited until we’d been dating for a few months before asking. I went with the stupid truth. She hesitated, clearly debating why she was dating this goober, and then started to laugh. She doesn’t let me lie about it anymore either.

I was thinking, now that I have a good 3, 4 or maybe even 5 regular readers: what the stupidest way you’ve hurt yourself? I’ve already gone, I’m pretty sure the Mrs. Frinklin will use this recent misadventure with oversized sandals.

Posted by Frinklin at May 18, 2004 06:00 PM

I was riding my bicyle down the road, going at a pretty good clip. I noticed some guys over in a field shooting arrows into the sky. I turned my head to watch and see how high the arrows went. I guess I ran off the road and hit a guard post or soemthing. All I know is that when I woke up several hj\ours later back at home, I had been to the hospital for stitches and didn't remember anything susbstantial about the previous week. I still have a nasty scar on the back of my head... luckily I will never go bald... so no one will ever see it.

Posted by: Madfish Willie at May 18, 2004 08:01 PM

You know when you do the centrifuge thing with a bucket of water? Where you can sling it in a circle and not have any of the water come out? I was trying to prove this fact at a car wash in college, and when I slung the bucket over my head, something in my shoulder popped. In stopping, I also dumped a couple of gallons of water on my self.

It was just a strain, but I couldn't lift my arm over my head for a week.

Posted by: BSTommy at May 22, 2004 05:49 AM

Lmao. One time, when I was 6, I climbed out of the little playground tower, ontop of the tube slide, and fell off. It was pretty high up too, A good 10 feet, and when I fell, I fell face down, So I shot my arms out to protect my face, and I ended up Bending the bone in my either upper or lower arm. I think Upper. They say it was pretty damn close to a break, but my bones were really strong, and still had alot of cartlidge in them due to my age, so it didn't break, but it still hurt a lot. For 2 years, Whenever I would straighten my arm out infront of me, it curved inwards. Hahaha.

Posted by: Christina at January 9, 2005 11:10 AM
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