June 02, 2004

The NBA: Its FAN-tabulous

The NBA finals are set, the Evil Hated Lakers will take on the unwatchable Detroit Pistons. The Pistons won the Eastern Conference on the strength of a 69-65 game 6 win over Indiana.


There really should be a law against this. I seriously question the sanity of anyone who watched this game for more than 3 minutes in a sitting. Bill Simmons has tried to make the point that this isn't bad basketball, this is really good basketball. He and Wiley tried to argue that this is akin to challenging jazz music, and isn't for less cultivated tastes.

Well, call me a Philistine then, because I hate this. Now, don't get me wrong: I'm not an offense-obsessed fan in any other sport. I love a close, well-pitched baseball game. I prefer a 1-0 to a 6-5 in hockey, watching a good goalie work is one of the great pleasures in sports. This is not those things. This is a winning team never making more than 40% of its shots. This is non-stop fouling and missed free throws. Modern NBA basketball is endless 1-on-1s, countless clanked 3-pointers, and a never-ending supply of 19-year olds who run like antelopes and jump like fleas having no idea what a medium ranger jumper is, let alone how to make one.

This year's Finals will get far better ratings than last years debacle, if only because the Lakers Traveling Circus is in town. If there is any justice (and I can't believe I'm about to say this) the Lakers will throttle the Pistons as quickly as possible. Not only will this put us out of our misery, it will stop the most frightening thing I can imagine: Detroit wins, and everybody else plays like this. Can you imagine? An entire season where nobody breaks 90 points unless it's a 4-overtime game.

Please LeBron, rescue us from this.

Posted by Frinklin at June 2, 2004 08:00 PM
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